You really want to find that special, true love. Deep, passionate, connected, forever love. Why does it seem so impossible to find these days? Don’t get discouraged, darling. It is possible to learn how to find love.

Here’s the secret: you must be authentic. Authenticity is defined as being genuine and showing up as the unique and divine individual you are. Like your fingerprint, no one in the world is exactly like you.

Unfortunately, we often let feelings of shame take over rather than celebrate our unique differences. We strive to create “sameness,” so we can fit in, be accepted, and ultimately connect. We adjust, change, and shrink our authentic selves, putting on masks to hide our true selves.

What happens? You connect.

However, it isn’t the strong, sustainable, and meaningful connection your heart and soul are craving because it isn’t created from a genuine, authentic place. As a result, the masks you wear to be accepted only create barriers to what you really want.

Have you ever noticed that when you start dating someone, you act differently? You like new things and take up new hobbies. Don’t get me wrong here; expansion and new experiences are wonderful, and if meeting someone expands your authentic, divinely created, beautiful self — great, go for it!

But too often, we try to change ourselves or hide parts of who we are to gain acceptance or to fit into someone else’s life. Our deep desire to create a loving connection makes us morph into someone other than our authentic selves.

For example, you might be afraid of rejection if you don’t like the same things as the person you are dating or show up as who you are. What could possibly be more painful than being vulnerable, sharing your complete and unique self with someone, and being rejected, right?

How about fitting into another person’s life so nicely that you develop a long-term relationship, possibly even get married and have kids, and, a few years down the road, feel exhausted, bored, and confined, living in the box you have created for yourself trying to be someone who is not you?

So, consider the pain from this kind of relationship failure, lack of connection, and living unhappily ever after.

Shifting from trying to fit into everyone else’s world to embracing authenticity can be difficult. It can also be the result of an imbalance or lock in your solar plexus chakra.

In addition, we are energetic beings. From the very first religious writings, the Vedic religion comes the belief that human beings have seven energy centers — the vertically aligned chakras starting at the base of the spine and extending to the top of the head.

If you prefer to look at this from a scientific perspective, quantum physics teaches us that we are all made up of energy and connected through this energy. Often, experiences in life cause us to shut down to protect ourselves. When we do this, we create locks in our energy centers or chakras. Then, these locks prevent us from attracting and keeping the true love we desire.

When you feel unempowered, struggle with low self-esteem, or fear looking foolish if you show up as your authentic self, it indicates a lock in your third energy center, the solar plexus chakra.

If this resonates with you, you might benefit from balancing your solar plexus chakra. Luckily, you can become more authentic and shine brighter by doing these four things now.

1. Spend some time in the sun.

Your solar plexus is yellow, just like the sun. Because of that, the light from the sun can activate the balancing of this chakra. Put on your sunscreen, sit outside, and absorb 15 minutes of sunshine whenever you can.

2. Let go of feelings of shame. 

Ask yourself what you feel most ashamed of. Write this on some paper, and then burn it in a safe place. This will help you let go of any feelings of shame and transmute the energy from shame to love.

3. Memorize and use these daily affirmations.

I am powerful.

I trust my own guidance.

I am authentic.

I am a powerful creator of my life.

I am using my power to make a positive difference.

4. Heal your gut. 

Issues with the digestive tract, liver, or adrenals indicate an imbalance with your solar plexus. To put it simply, an imbalance in our emotional/spiritual realms creates an imbalance in our physical bodies.

Spending time focused on healing the physical impacts is smart. Your naturopath or nutritionist can help, but start today by eating more vegetables and much less gluten and dairy.

By unlocking your solar plexus chakra, you will be able to be authentic in all areas of your life, especially love. When you feel safe and confident as the real you, you will attract the right person — and you will create the epic true love you desire.