A relationship coach Reverend Catherine Onwioduokit has cautioned against investing so much in relationships.
Mama Cathy says persons who invest more in relationships are those who suffer severe emotional breakdowns when there is a breakup.
“Love is a feeling, love is an emotion but if you go into a relationship armoured with those feelings and emotions you’re going to have a shock of your life," she said on JoyFM's Super Morning Show, Friday.
Mama Cathy described heartbreaks as one of the most difficult moments in peoples [relationship] life, however, no matter how difficult, victims must learn to get over the situation.
“Unfortunately when people are in love, they deal more with feelings and emotions but love is actually a choice and a decision and that is should inform you on how to engage the other person.
"So if it happens that at the end of the day, after all the investment, after all the emotional sting you disperse, after all the attachment; the bonding and all the sweet sweet things that you thought you were enjoying, suddenly the thing breaks up, what do you do?”
She advised that to prevent cases of heartbreaks or to reduce the pain, persons should have clear cuts, and define what they want their relationships to be even before the relationship starts.
"You need to engage the mind of the person because if you don’t engage the mind, if you don’t engage that soul, if you don’t engage the person you are in love with to know where the person is driving this relationship to, you're going to be in a problem and definitely, a heartbreak will come," she said.
She, however, also advised that the best way to handle incidents of heartbreaks thoroughly is to sit down and realize that the fault is not that the victim's.
“You need to take control of your mind because heartbreak may literally shatter you. Be conscious of what you want to become after all of these incidents and all of these drama.
"Ask yourself what went wrong, ask yourself what you do next, ask yourself how best to handle relationships after the one that ended and also learn to let go.
"Sometimes we are limited by what we know. When we think we invested so much that we cannot do without the person, it may be difficult to let go but sometimes, let's view the situation as one that God is using to save us from an untold difficulty in the future. It not every heartbreak that is evil," she said.
She further advised against committing into a new relationship when one has not fully recovered from the previous one.
“If your heart is broken and you're not fully healed, but you want to prove a point to the person who broke your heart and you enter into another one, there is a high tendency that you are going to end up hitting the rock also,” she said.
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