It’s not you, it's the mirror Shopping for a new outfit always sounds fun -- until you’re in the dressing room accosted by harsh mirrors and even harsher lighting. Toss random sizing systems into the mix, and it’s a wonder we even set foot in the mall. Before you have a meltdown, remember three things: 1. Dressing room mirrors are almost never flattering. 2. Some cuts won’t look good on anyone. 3. Celebrities also hate trying on clothes -- that’s why they have tailors! Here’s how to make your clothing work on your body. After all, you own it -- it doesn’t own you. (And it’s certainly easier to adjust a garment than to change your genetics!) Stacking the deck How can you set yourself up for success at the mall? Try these tips from Dr. Sari Shepphird, a psychologist based in L.A. 1. Keep it fun and diffuse anxiety by inviting a friend and going for coffee first. Or go for a walk or run together to get those post-workout endorphins. 2. Instead of focusing on your perceived flaws while you’re trying on clothes, focus only on finding clothes that accentuate your favorite features. Beeline for wrap dresses that hug your curves. Search for the right color blouse that brings out your eye color. 3. If you’re PMS-ing, postpone your shopping trip. Even if you miss a sale, you’ll save your sanity! What to bring 1. "Look your best when you shop," suggests Kim Johnson Gross, style expert. Wear an outfit that makes you feel great and do whatever you need to feel your best. If that means lavishing special attention on your hair, makeup, even underwear -- don’t hold back! 2. Wear Spanx if necessary and a strapless bra for versatility. 3. Try shopping for accessories and shoes first -- anything you can try on without needing to schlep into the dressing room. It can help boost your confidence. Where to go Some stores will bring out your best; others, not so much. Yay! -- High-end department stores tend to have better lighting and soft-colored walls, which flatter your skin tone with warm, natural light. Nay -- Chain stores…"Dressing rooms are often cold, cramped and harshly lit," says personal image expert Kimberly Seltzer. Maybe -- Some new Chico’s stores have mirrors in a common area, so women can exchange ideas and feedback. "Some women like the solidarity," says Gross. "Others are too embarrassed to try on clothes with other women around." If the store has an easy return policy, try on clothes in the comfort of your own home. Size ain't nothing but a number When it comes to sizing, the same number can mean totally different things from one label to another. "Ignore numbers at all costs," says Bridget Livingston, body image expert. "Cut the size tags out of clothes if this bothers you." A good fit in the next size up will actually make you look trimmer than squeezing into something smaller. Panic room? You’re facing off with your reflection -- and neither of you is happy. Don’t panic, says Dr. Shepphird. 1. Most dressing rooms actually have the least flattering lighting possible -- and their three-way mirrors will exaggerate any flaws. No one will ever scrutinize you like that. 2. Don’t compare your shape or size to someone else’s -- certainly not models or celebrities whose images are heavily airbrushed. 3. Try "thought-stopping": Say “Stop!” to break the chain reaction of negative thoughts ("This looks horrible, I’m horrible, I’m worthless…"). Sing along to the song on the loudspeaker, think about the happy occasion you’re shopping for or call a friend. 4. Squelch extreme thinking like "I’ll never look good in short sleeves" or "I’ll always be overweight." "Always" and "never" are almost never true. On the plus side Retailers are beginning to wise up that so-called "standard clothing" fits fewer and fewer people. That's why more plus-size lines are showing up on the scene. The celeb secret to the perfect fit Clothes seldom fit right off the rack -- that’s why celebrities swear by their tailors. Even if you bought it dirt-cheap, adjusting the seams or hem will make you look like a million bucks. "Fit your largest area first, then tailor from there," says Lori Ann Robinson, fashion consultant. •Busty celebrities like Scarlett Johansson and Tyra Banks will buy a jacket that fits (and closes over) the bustline, then fix the shoulders. •Beyonce, like other curvy women, buys her jeans a size up to ensure there’s room for her hips and thighs, then tailors the waist. •Demi Moore and Teri Hatcher, both top-heavy, will buy their shirts one size larger and have the sleeves slimmed down. Tricks of the trade Flatter your figure with strategic shopping. •Look for softer, fluid fabric (think synthetics) if you carry weight on your hips. It will drape nicely across your derriere and tummy. Harder, finished cottons will “stand away” from the body, adding unwelcome heft. • If you haven’t found jeans that flatter, try a denim trouser. •Remove inner side pockets on pants and have the seam sewn up. It will help your hips appear slimmer. •Stay away from pants that bunch at the crotch when you sit or walk. • "If it's a bad fit to begin with -- seams puckering or pulling, sleeves too short -- don't mess with it," says Robinson. "Sometimes there's a reason clothes are on the sale rack."