For many people observing the lives of celebrities - actors, musicians and content creators - from afar, the limelight seems to be filled with riches and endless fun.

But for secular musician turned Gospel act, Irene Logan, her journey was riddled with addiction, wrong association, dissatisfaction, rejection and depression.

Speaking on The Reason is Jesus on Joy FM, on Sunday, she revealed that beginning her journey in the public eye at the age of 22, she wanted to just fit in.

“I had grown up in a Christian home, and I wanted to explore the world, so that steered me away from my true calling,” Irene said.

The need to be one of the people running in the cool crowd, she explained, had stemmed from the insecurities she had as an only child who always wanted to know what it felt like to have a sibling.

Parents have very high expectations for their kids, however, for Irene, even though she did not toe the line her parents wanted her to, they embraced her decision to be a secular artiste despite the talk her decision had generated.

For a young lady who saw herself as an adult, this was the chance to do what she wanted, take the chance to have eye-opening experiences.

“It put me in a world that wasn’t meant for me. It opened me up to all types of associations that led me to all types of addictions and it altered a big portion of my life,” she told Fiifi Folson, host of the show.

Irene said she took up smoking but despite the fact that she was a secular musician, she had an image to protect, thus very few people knew she had been smoking.

Being in an environment where smoking was not considered a vice, protecting an image did not stop her from indulging in the activity she had gotten addicted to.

But after years of “battling her calling” Irene Logan had a liberating experience in church that convinced her to leave the secular music for gospel.

“I was so eager to tell the world that 'this is it, I am going gospel'. I told people and people told people and it started making rounds but the truth was I really wasn't ready," she said.

Despite being convinced she had to change her associations and drop her addictions, Irene said she was afraid of losing all that she had built for herself.

The fear overwhelmed her so much she decided to stay put in the world of secular music.

However, her decision came with consequences. Irene stated that the career she seemed so determined to protect began to fall apart before her eyes. Like a plane that has crashed, the career could not be salvaged with what pieces were left behind. 

“I was in deep depression but this time around, it was really bad. I used to pray to God to [let me] die. Then I started smoking more, it went from a few sticks to a pack or two a day.”

“I secluded myself from everybody because nothing was working. So I used to pray to say ‘I am ready, if You really don’t want me to do secular music and focus on Your work, you need to let me know.”

Her battle with addictions, dissatisfaction and depression while dealing with a failed career, Irene Logan said, went on for years until she found the light again.

After another liberating and freeing encounter at church, following a night of tears, exasperation and desperately praying for a normal life, the singer was ready to fully commit herself to God - and this time mean it.

She wanted to be free from the fear that had gripped her to accept the love God was offering.

“I got out because of grace. The story of Jonah in the belly of the whale I can relate to it so much because no matter how far ran away from God, he found me and he made sure he got me right here at this moment,” Irene Logan said.

After her experience at church, Irene’s addictions and depression seemed to have left her.

Although the story of a revert was one the media and fans would love to have their noses in, for two years, the singer said she guarded her ‘secret’.

“It wasn’t because I was ashamed. I wanted to grow in my conviction, I wanted direction. It's easy to think, I sing so in my ministry I am supposed to be singing. But what if it was a different direction. Even if it is singing, what was my message? What message did He want me to carry?”

Within the two years, Irene said she wanted complete clarity on what the Almighty had planned for her.

Now after finally finding her true purpose, Irene Logan has released her first Gospel single ‘More’.

The newly converted gospel artiste says the single is a prophetic worship song about purpose and yearning for more of Jesus Christ.

Irene sees ‘More’ as truly personal for her. According to her, the track was gifted to her by the Holy Spirit during her period of surrender and wait.