Family planning is good o. In listening to the advice of the National Population Council not to born plenty pikins, I bought ten pieces of eyi for my wife and I to use against any ‘not-ready-for’ baby.

I hate to use the term ‘unwanted babies’ bcos they turn out to become some of the best! The following day, she travelled for 8 days and at the time of her departure, we were left with still only 10 pieces of the family planning ‘these things’. When she returned it has reduced to 3. Come and see confrontation! Of course, I blamed it on Michael, that my friend who always feels shy to get to the pharmacy to buy his own. Meanwhile, Michael and his wife are struggling to have children so my wife wondered why Michael would want to do family planning when…hmmm. I should have told her the rats in the bedroom came for them as balloons like by now I am a free man! We are still fighting. God forgive me la!

Is it not dangerous to remain in a traffic congestion right on a bridge? After the Italy bridge disaster recently, I started becoming conscious of something o. I am nowhere near being an expert in an engineering field but I think that it would be dangerous for vehicles to remain packed-waiting on a bridge due to traffic congestion. This is what is currently happening at the Weija bridge near the Tetegu traffic lights o.

Sometimes you see two trailers carrying a 40-footer container and tipper truck with other smaller vehicles including mine all packed right on the bridge awaiting the Tetegu red light to turn green and one could virtually feel the discomfort under the ‘breathing’ bridge. May I suggest that in view of the rising traffic congestion overflow to the bridge due to the Tetegu traffic lights especially during rush hours, the police should come in to control vehicles such that when there is traffic ahead, vehicles coming from the other side of the bridge would wait behind the bridge till the traffic ahead gives way! I believe this will avert any possible catastrophe. Roads and Highways should take a look at this. Bridge collapses like heart attacks, don’t often show any signs; before you know it, grrrrr! Disaster!

However, if for any reason the Highways experts think there is no problem with cars waiting on a bridge, then I have no problem too but woe onto any engineer trained in Mastachussets Technical ‘whine whine’ come and be doing any ‘unnecessary’ analysis in the media in the event of a disaster o, yoo! In this country, we are very good at ‘giving medicine after death’!  

It’s Fridayyyy and salaries have been paid. I am going to do father Christmas again – sharing it among ‘unnecessary’ girls who are on my payroll.

What is it again? Haven’t you ever killed a crab or even mosquito or chicken? Ah ah ah!

This small kill, I killed too you have a problem with it. Why are you like that?

Please check your pockets now if your car keys are there. Have you finished? If not please go home and sleep.

In fact you lose nothing if you don’t continue reading the upcoming good for nothing black black dots.

It is with no doubt that dogs are some of man’s closest domestic friends and it is not uncommon to hear about stories being told about people especially in the Western World who have willed their properties to dogs because of the love they have for them as much as they do for humans!

In October 2011, I ‘fell in love’ with a puppy that belonged to a neighbour. This puppy became an instant friend and I nurtured it so well and had the consent of the owner to name it ‘Cadafi’. ‘Cadafi’ because the name was synonymous with the name of a former African Leader. Cadafi was brought in just around the same time that the heat was on him (that African Leader) to step down in an uprising which eventually led to his exit from this earth.

Cadafi grew up into a fine hybrid of local and an Alsatian dog, very wild but reserved. Cadafi was always seen with me as I fed and bathed it!

At this point, I know you are asking “and so what”. That one is your problem. Me send you? Hahaaaa.

It was not that big but very strong to the extent that at some point the real owner was neither happy nor sad about the name given it as it bore semblance with the style of the former African Leader. It feared no one but would not also trouble you if you don’t ‘bring yourself’ re-echoing the fact that the primary responsibility of a normal dog is to bite when provoked or to ‘tame’ or scare away a trespasser or a thief.

Cadafi was the first to welcome me back from work upon hearing the sound of my car engine and virtually took over the driver’s seat when I got down from the car!

Cadafi was a calm dog but feared by other dogs in the vicinity and occasionally accepted food from its original owner. It was my best ‘friend’ until 28^th December, 2012 when I had just returned from a Christmas visit to a friend.

Cadafi upon seeing my car did not bother to get closer as usual. ‘Is Cadafi hungry or not well or probably had not seen me?’ I asked myself. I walked past Cadafi expecting the usual ‘embrace’ but no – it was not even looking my direction!

I entered my room, changed into boxer shorts and came out to hang my sweat-soaked singlet on the drying line. Cadafi was just lying down without any sign of sickness nor hunger; quite unusual of my Cadafi.

Near mayhem reared its ugly head as soon as I called out ‘hey Cadafi’ and hell broke loose. My pet pounced on me in a morbid attempt to bite and chew me up. I could see its teeth exposed in an attacking mode. Immediately I realized there was something wrong with my pet. Instant fear gripped me and I started screaming on top of my voice and a neighbor attempted intervening with a club but Cadafi was determined to ‘finish’ me. I had to run round my house in boxer shorts in the full glare of people around exposing some ‘confidential items’.

I scratched my back against some concrete blocks in the process but survived the ‘Cadafi’ attack after it failed in its attempt to unleash mayhem on me. I was so terrified I could hardly enter my room but when I eventually did, while panting I picked up a big stone and threw it at my now enemy Cadafi to move further away; it did not budge but rather attempted swallowing the stone! It was then I had concluded that my ‘friend’ might probably have been infected by the deadly rabies. But how come? I asked myself. After narrating my ordeal to the original owner, he, obviously with some experience with dogs, explained that the likelihood of it having fought with and sustained scratches or even mating with an infected animal could possibly be the cause.

My co-tenant was the next victim. While hanging his washed clothes on the dying line, Cadafi went to pull down the pair of trousers he was wearing and bit his buttocks in the process. He immediately had to rush for some form of an initial injection at a nearby clinic but sadly it was ‘mission impossible’ to get an anti-rabies injection.

We did not waste time but to get the ‘boys’ who found it as a delicacy to catch and do justice to it to end ‘its era’. Hard as they tried, they could not get it to kill it because it became wilder. After the third day or so Cadafi got missing and could not be found till date. ‘Assuming these ‘boys’ had been able to get it for a meal, was its delicacy even going to be safe for consumption by humans in the first place?’ I silently asked myself.

The above ‘unnecessary’ story is only a curtain raiser to recent developments as far as dog bites are concerned. I recently lost a hen when a neighbour’s dog came to attack and munch it and its chicks right before my very eyes.

Barely a week later, it was in the news that some two kids were attacked and killed by dogs in two separate incidents under some bizarre circumstances in some parts of the country. In each of these cases, the dog belonged to someone else and not the parents or guardians of the victims. In the case of one of the victims, his parents and siblings had had to be quarantined and treated to avert the possibility of spreading a possible rabies infection. I don’t think anyone wants to die this way or lose a loved one the way they happened. 

A few years ago, I attended the funeral of a 14-year old BECE candidate who died after about 3 weeks following a dog bite possibly with rabies. After the bite, the poor family became helpless and did not take further action with the hope that he would be fine by God’s Grace; he died 3 weeks later.

I was told the anti-rabies vaccines can mainly be accessed at the Adabraka Polyclinic whereas Kokrobite, Ada, Kpone, Tema, Pokuase are all part of the Region but are not less privileged in terms of proximity in the events of emergency provided the vaccines are available.

Many dog owners do not see the need to vaccinate their dogs and as they mildly put it ‘our dogs are very calm and would attack and bite only when they are provoked’ – this is where massive education needs to be intensified because of the huge level of ignorance.

Have a nice weekend but until you vaccinate your dogs, please don’t call me again.