Nature versus nurture is one of the oldest debates. But I’m hoping it will give me a clue about my boys?
I have two boys.
One is a quiet, respectful, shy boy that would rather play 12 hours of video games a day than see the light of day.
The other? A mini tornado. Really, there's no other way to describe him. He's loud, always busy, and won't sit in front of a video game because he can't. sit. still.
What gives? They are being raised in the same house. Same parents. Same meals. Same rules.
Why aren't they the same? Or at least... similar?
One could easily survive on nothing but meat. The other? Clears his plate of veggies first every night.
One is always cold. The other is always hot.
I can't discipline them the same, or even talk to them the same way.
What's a Mom to do?
I'm trying to respect their differences and celebrate their individual strengths, but really?
I just want to say, "Why can't you be more like your brother?"
I want to say it to both of them, because they are both full of amazing qualities. I am hoping that seeing qualities in each other like kindness, honesty, and independence will rub off. Right now, though, it seems like the only things rubbing off are tattling and arguing.
One boy looks like me, but has traits that are straight from my husband.
And the other?
You guessed it.
The opposite.
Before I had kids, I would have argued that it was nurture all the way.
I think I have actually said, "those kids behave that way because their parents don't discipline them."
Ha. That former me had never been in a grocery store with a screaming, tantrum throwing 2 year-old.
But when I look at my son and see my husband's eyes, my temper, and energy that just has to come from whoknowswhere? I think nature.
Has to be nature.
Right?
Then I remember that 25 short years ago, my mother was thinking the very same thoughts about my brother and I.
I'm scared to ask what answer she came up with.
Source: www.momtourage.com
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