“You bad boy!” I overheard my next door neighbour scream at the son. Suddenly, there was clanging of metals followed by a piercing cry of the little boy. He came running out of the room crying for help.

The mother apparently angered by something he might have done wrong couldn’t wait wait till morning to discipline him. In her anger, she decided to hurl pans and plates at him in the middle of the night.

That is a typical situation. We all do find ourselves in this kind of situation once in a while. Someone does or says something that we feel shouldn’t have been done or said to us. We dislike it; we disagree with it, but we allow it to permeate our peaceful souls. When it does, it makes us feel threatened, we feel we have been wronged, taken for granted and cheated. And then we absolutely justify our disagreement with what has been said or done to us.

And so, we get hurt, we become peeved and then the adrenalin runs through us. Some kind of heat swirls inside our chests and culminates into a tightness – we are angry!

That is when we quickly react. We respond in self-defence before we have time to think through our actions.

That is what anger can do to you. In fact, when you get angry for whatever reason, you greatly lose the ability to reason. Your emotions override your reasoning power. Your sense of empathy is overwhelmed and drowned in the ocean of sense of self-protection. The only thing you could think of is how to defend, prove yourself or punish the object of your anger.

Psychologists and Psychiatrists describe anger as a form of mental illness - but it is a mild one. So you see, we all get 'mad' occasionally.

Anger can be destructive and unproductive. We all know that. Don’t we? Can you remember any good or reasonable thing you might have done out of anger? Although, some could argue that the only time they were able to deal decisively with a nuisance they have had to put up with for a long time was when they got angry. That is indisputable, in some instances, but anger, certainly is not a pleasant feeling. Is it?

Let’s look at some few examples in history. Moses, was one of the greatest people in history and the only man reputed to have spoken to God face to face. He was given the onerous and remarkable duty of leading his people to the promised land. Through out the journeys, he endured all kinds of bickering and troubles the people he was leading gave him. He managed to contain with great restraint, the whimpering of an ungrateful lot of people without snapping. But at a point he lost his self-control and became angry. He lost his cool and became angry with the people. He couldn't put up with them any longer.

It happened when the people in his care complained profusely of being tired and weary, despite all the miraculous interventions they had experienced through the journey. It was their complaints for water that tested Moses’s patience to elastic limits and broke it.

Moses decided to pray and seek God’s help in resolving the matter, because it was the only option he had. So he went into prayer.

According to the Good Book, God instructed him on what to do to resolve the problem. He was instructed to climb up a rock, speak to it and water will gush out for the thirsty people to drink.

Moses went back to the people feeling enthusiastic, confident and hopeful. But he was unprepared for what met him. The people approached him with more complaints, murmuring and nagging. He couldn’t stand it anymore. Not this time. He became angry, and in his fury, he forgot the specific instruction he was given. And instead of speaking to the rock, he yelled against the people. He shouted, “you stiff-necked people. Must I give you water out of this rock?” And then, Moses hit the rock three times!

Notwithstanding his action, which was contrary to the original orders he was given, the miracle still happened. Water gushed out of the rock for the people to quench their thirst.

But Moses’s disobedience, which is as a result of his anger against the people, displeased God. That was the development that resulted in the now famous quotation, “your eyes shall see Canaan, but your feet shall not step in there.”

Moses as a result, lost the singular honour and glory of leading his people into the promised land, because he acted in anger at a crucial moment of his life.

Well, you see, it looks like it is easier to get angry with people and events than it is not. But, there is always an opportunity - a window of opportunity between when you are provoked and when you actually get angry. So let’s make conscious efforts at exercising restraint in the face of provocation. We all have the capacity to do so, a little practice would help.

It is commonly said that when you are angry and you feel like exploding, relax and count from one to ten. When you do, it is likely that your anger might subside before you could actually act.

It pays to be patient, to take time and act reasonably when you are angry. You could save yourself and others, the destructive results of anger, some of which, you might have the chance to regret, but some other products of anger could be so fatal that you would probably never have the opportunity to regret from or correct.

Please hold your anger!


By Emmanuel K. Dogbevi

Email: edogbevi@hotmail.com